how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
vagina is talking i cant
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
