it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
