new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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