Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
