Apparently you make a good broom.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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