So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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