Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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