what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
