It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
