Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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