let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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