we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
