I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
