Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
