Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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