so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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