Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
