You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
