He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize