Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
