Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize