The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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