A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize
