you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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