a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
