i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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