I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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