I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Randomize
