Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
