hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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