I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
