we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
