This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
