This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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