So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I have tasted many bathrooms
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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