Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab

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(250): View more from British Columbia

my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.

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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now

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(707): View more from California

I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.

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(727): View more from Florida

I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"

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(420): View more from

Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.

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(760): View more from California

And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day

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(775): View more from Nevada

Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.

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