Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
