just come out here and I will go home with you...
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
