You work out of a Hotel?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
we're so committed to being not committed
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
