So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
