Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
