i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
even my farts smell like vagina
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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