I've blown a few things in my day
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
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