he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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