I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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