i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
