OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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