Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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