These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
