am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
