I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
