so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
